300

look. don’t try to pretend
you don’t like me. we’re way too deep
for those kinds of games.
I’m not asking for the moon, you idiot,
or anything you are not willing
to give. haven’t I proved
my patience by now?

you’d be lucky
to have me. I’m fucking
awesome and I think
my resume has proved
that I am a great girlfriend.
fuck you if you think
I’m not good enough
for you.

I can go on a well-known website
where one can post free personals
and easily amass a veritable
army of dudes
begging me to grace them
with my presence. I can recreate
the movie 300
with men who would love to be
my paramour.

don’t make me sic them
on your ass.